‘Look through’ him
A few months ago, I broke up with my boyfriend of almost a year. It was very painful for me, but I am much better now. The problem is that we both stay in the same locality, and I see him almost every day. And, when we cross paths, he is very rude to me and unfriendly. So much that he makes an obvious effort to embarrass me around others. How can I handle running into him when he is so rude? It would be so much better if he was at least civil.
Your discomfort could be giving him some pleasure and he is feeding on it. Go up to him when there is no one else around him, and assertively tell him that if he cannot be civil with you and take the break-up maturely and healthily, then he should refrain from any communication with you, whether alone or when there are others. Also stay away from groups that he tends to be with for a while, and ‘look through’ him if he does not change his ways. If you maintain a dignified silence and are comfortable within yourself, and if people notice him resorting to immature rudeness in spite of your dignified approach, over a period of time, he will come across as a crude person to all. In the mean time, also mingle with new people, get into activities you enjoy, and make new acquaintances, so that you find joy. As you get more busy finding joy in other things, you will find it easier to ignore your ex’s immature behavior.
Smegma
I often see a white cheesy substance collected between the outer lips (labia majora) and inner lips (labia minora) of my vagina. I do not have any STD. It looks and smells foul. I fear it may come in the way of our sexual pleasure if my partner notices it. Is there any way to prevent getting this white substance?
Normally, the vagina secretes a clear or whitish fluid to cleanse itself and maintain a healthy environment in that area. Any changes in normal vaginal secretions (color, smell, consistency etc.) indicate the presence of an infection for which you might have to visit your doctor.
What you have described in your question sounds similar to the cheesy substance noticed by men under the foreskin (smegma) of uncircumcised penises.
Smegma is a natural lubricating residue made up of dead skin cells, skin oil secretions (sebum), and moisture, including sweat. Its appearance can vary in colour from off-white to a darker shade, depending on an individual’s skin color. Smegma gets collected in the nooks and crevices of the body’s skin folds, including between the labia majora and minora and around the clitoral hood. Smegma is known for its distinctive odour.
If the build up of smegma is troublesome, it can be washed away easily with plain or warm water. As the mucosal skin of the vulva is sensitive, it is best to avoid applying soap while cleaning it.